... ME! It was the Bauer Awards last night, which is when all the magazines in the company have a big piss-up at Grosvenor House, pretend they're not bothered about winning anything and boo loudly when love rats go up on stage to collect awards (LONG story...). I got shortlisted in the Rising Star category and had a brilliant evening. I had a bit of a revelation beforehand - I'd been worrying for days about what to wear, and I only realised on the day itself that I hadn't given a second thought to the fact that this would be the biggest, most formal eating/drinking situation I'd been in since starting the diet. But once again, everyone else was much more bothered about it than I was, constantly asking if I was OK, etc. Luckily I had a greedy boy to eat my food, and plenty of thirsty workmates to drink my share of the alcohol. So selfless of them. Anyway, this blog's been absent from photos for a while which seems silly as, really, who wants to read about weight loss unless there are photos? So, here's a picture of me last night in my new size 14 Oasis dress, alongside a picture of me from the same awards a year ago, looking drunk and hideous in a size 18 dress...
Saturday, 18 October 2008
Tuesday, 14 October 2008
I'm so vain, I probably think this blog is about me
If there's one thing I can't stand it's vanity. I find it particularly repugnant when men spend way too much time on their hair, clothes and - the worst - tans (sorry Stef), but I'm also not a big fan of girls who are completely obsessed with the way they look. Or, at least, I used to feel that way. But, now that I'm three stone lighter (OK, 2 stone, 12 lbs lighter, let's not get ahead of ourselves) I'm obsessed with looking at pictures of myself, checking myself out in mirrors, buying clothes and then trying said clothes on several times while checking myself out in mirrors and, yep, possibly even taking pictures of myself doing it and then looking at them. If I wasn't me, I would think I was a total twat.
I had today off work for tedious reasons involving Sky engineers, and this morning I went shopping in Croydon with the intention of buying two, just two, items - some new jeans, as my old ones now all look beyond ridiculous, and a dress for the Bauer Awards this Friday. I ended up buying the jeans... plus a skirt, some shoes, a necklace, some tights and FOUR dresses. I've also got two dresses on the way from ASOS, and another one from somewhere in America. I think somebody should probably take my debit card away (Dad?) before this gets any more out of control. To be fair, though, the jeans were a tenner from New Look and a lot of the other stuff was from Primark, so I didn't spend a huge amount... but probably more than I should have done considering some of these items will be too big for me quite quickly. I used to hate shopping, but now that I'm thinner, I have to confess that I rather like it. Suddenly changing rooms aren't evil and Topshop isn't a no-go zone. I've still got a way to go, as at the moment I'm a size 14 in everything but jeans, thanks to my sticky-outy, size 16 bum, but just a few months ago that bum sometimes struggled to get into 18s, so it's progress. I also have a ridiculous new bra size, as I've lost a lot off my back, but not too much cuppage - so I'm now a 34GG, when I used to be a 36GG or 38G. Perhaps I should do porn.
Speaking of which (boobs, not porn - this isn't that kind of website), I had to buy a hideous sports bra yesterday because... wait for it... I've joined the gym! On my last blog post, an anonymous reader (ooh, mysterious...) asked if I was doing any exercise so I can now answer this. I've been going swimming at South Norwood Leisure Centre a couple of times a week since July, but now that I'm lighter and feel more confident, I decided to sign up to their gym as well. It's cheap and really modern, and never appears to be very busy. I've just got back from my induction and it was surprisingly OK. The instructor was nice and I explained the diet and everything to her, so I've got a programme which will mainly focus on toning, as obviously this is a big concern when I'm losing a lot of weight very quickly. I discovered that I'm actually stronger and fitter than I thought I was, but then last time I had a gym induction was in 2003 when I was a lot heavier (I lost a couple of stone on Weightwatchers in 2004, and kept most of it off before starting Lighter Life). We've also been given a stretchy exercise band thing, a Swiss ball and a couple of DVDs at our Lighter Life meetings, but it's tricky for me to use these at home as my flat is very small, and Delilah (my cat) thinks it's a fun game and tries to join in. Anyway, people who witter on about exercise are really, really dull so I won't expand further, other than to say yes, I'm exercising, and I plan to step it up as my calorie intake rises - on only 500 a day, I need to be careful I don't overdo it.
I've got about four weeks to go until the initial 100 days of Lighter Life is over and I hope to lose around 18 more pounds in that time. I then have a choice: if I'm happy where I am, I can move into "Route To Management" which is where food starts to be re-introduced. Or if I want to lose a bit more weight, I can go into "Development" which means I'd carry on with the no-food, no-booze, no-life (not true) thing until I reach my goal. I'd imagine I'll carry on for three or four weeks, and then start RTM around Christmas - which will be interesting, to say the least.
Any questions? If you ask me stuff, I might actually update this more often...
I had today off work for tedious reasons involving Sky engineers, and this morning I went shopping in Croydon with the intention of buying two, just two, items - some new jeans, as my old ones now all look beyond ridiculous, and a dress for the Bauer Awards this Friday. I ended up buying the jeans... plus a skirt, some shoes, a necklace, some tights and FOUR dresses. I've also got two dresses on the way from ASOS, and another one from somewhere in America. I think somebody should probably take my debit card away (Dad?) before this gets any more out of control. To be fair, though, the jeans were a tenner from New Look and a lot of the other stuff was from Primark, so I didn't spend a huge amount... but probably more than I should have done considering some of these items will be too big for me quite quickly. I used to hate shopping, but now that I'm thinner, I have to confess that I rather like it. Suddenly changing rooms aren't evil and Topshop isn't a no-go zone. I've still got a way to go, as at the moment I'm a size 14 in everything but jeans, thanks to my sticky-outy, size 16 bum, but just a few months ago that bum sometimes struggled to get into 18s, so it's progress. I also have a ridiculous new bra size, as I've lost a lot off my back, but not too much cuppage - so I'm now a 34GG, when I used to be a 36GG or 38G. Perhaps I should do porn.
Speaking of which (boobs, not porn - this isn't that kind of website), I had to buy a hideous sports bra yesterday because... wait for it... I've joined the gym! On my last blog post, an anonymous reader (ooh, mysterious...) asked if I was doing any exercise so I can now answer this. I've been going swimming at South Norwood Leisure Centre a couple of times a week since July, but now that I'm lighter and feel more confident, I decided to sign up to their gym as well. It's cheap and really modern, and never appears to be very busy. I've just got back from my induction and it was surprisingly OK. The instructor was nice and I explained the diet and everything to her, so I've got a programme which will mainly focus on toning, as obviously this is a big concern when I'm losing a lot of weight very quickly. I discovered that I'm actually stronger and fitter than I thought I was, but then last time I had a gym induction was in 2003 when I was a lot heavier (I lost a couple of stone on Weightwatchers in 2004, and kept most of it off before starting Lighter Life). We've also been given a stretchy exercise band thing, a Swiss ball and a couple of DVDs at our Lighter Life meetings, but it's tricky for me to use these at home as my flat is very small, and Delilah (my cat) thinks it's a fun game and tries to join in. Anyway, people who witter on about exercise are really, really dull so I won't expand further, other than to say yes, I'm exercising, and I plan to step it up as my calorie intake rises - on only 500 a day, I need to be careful I don't overdo it.
I've got about four weeks to go until the initial 100 days of Lighter Life is over and I hope to lose around 18 more pounds in that time. I then have a choice: if I'm happy where I am, I can move into "Route To Management" which is where food starts to be re-introduced. Or if I want to lose a bit more weight, I can go into "Development" which means I'd carry on with the no-food, no-booze, no-life (not true) thing until I reach my goal. I'd imagine I'll carry on for three or four weeks, and then start RTM around Christmas - which will be interesting, to say the least.
Any questions? If you ask me stuff, I might actually update this more often...
Wednesday, 1 October 2008
My blogging shame
Today I've had two complaints about my lack of recent bloggage. One of them even cited the date that I last wrote and pointed out that I'd said in that very entry that I'd be updating loads because I had time off work. Well, um, I lied, didn't I? But while I might not be sticking to my vow to update this regularly, I am sticking to the diet. No slip-ups, no drama and I've now lost over two stone. So, what the hell have I been doing with my time? Let's see...
Home improvements: My flat is now nearly as beautiful as I want it to be. Thanks to the combined skills and general brilliance of my parents (Mum = painting and curtain making superstar. Dad = demon driller) and my own sense of motivation (which I never used to have before this diet), my living room is now all kinds of gorgeous. It's been rid of crappy Argos bookshelves and Ikea bits and pieces, and is full of things I really love from vintage shops and eBay. Speaking of which...
Spending money: Oh my god, I'm addicted to shopping. Over the past few weeks, Paypal has become my best pal. I've realised that everything is better in America and have been buying all sorts of clothes that don't fit me yet from sites like pinupgirlclothing.com, as well as loads more tat for my house from far-flung corners of the world like Oklahoma, Rotterdam and, er, Crystal Palace. I've also been spending money in actual shops, where you have to deal with human beings and everything, and today bought my first much smaller item that actually fits. I know a size 14 isn't small by a lot of people's standards, but it is definitely in the realms of "normal" and "curvy" rather than "fat", so for me to be able to buy something that size - and not even something stretchy, but a fitted autumnal jacket - is quite an achievement. And it wasn't a fluke - I tried on several different coats of various shapes and colours, and 14 was the right size in all of them. This is partly because my boobs (which normally had me firmly in size 18 territory with anything that needed to fasten) have shrunk quite a bit over the past week or so. Don't worry, whammer fans, they're still definitely prominent, but you might want to kiss goodbye to them soon. Not literally. Unless you're fit. Today I also bought a waist-cinching belt in a medium (the large was too big! This is unheard of!) which shows where my weight is coming off - my waist is under 32 inches now, but my hips are still of child-bearing proportions and, well, baby's most definitely got back. I'm still definitely a 16 in jeans, but that's OK - I like having an arse, and I know things will be in proportion eventually.
Socialising: My struggle with having fun while not boozing/eating is over - it's now totally fine. I went to a wedding drinks thing on Saturday night and had a brilliant time - the best I've had since starting the diet, and it didn't bother me at all that people were scoffing chips and knocking back shots of sambuca. I've also been enjoying doing different things - there have been more trips to the theatre, more gigs, more nice lunchtime strolls, more ridiculous conversations with Nicky (the day we run out of things to say to each other is the day the world ends) and I've just got home from my first ever meeting of Isabel's Book Group For Nice Girls Who Are Clever And Not Pretentious (search for it on Facebook if you want to join) where we discussed Lionel Shriver's We Need To Talk About Kevin. A lovely mixture of people came along and it made me feel all warm inside - and without the aid of Jack Daniels. I think that when it comes to drinking again, I'll take a much more moderate approach, as I've realised I absolutely don't need it to have a good time, which is quite the revelation for me.
Getting a big head: I've been really touched and overwhelmed by how lovely 99 per cent of people I know have been about me doing this. Obviously it goes without saying that my closest friends and family have been amazing, but I've also been getting lots of support and encouragement from people I don't know so well. Every day I get compliments about how good I'm looking, and some of the most meaningful come in the form of private messages from random people on the fringes of my life, because I know they wouldn't bother if they didn't mean it. It really keeps me going and I'll be keeping them all in a special file so if I struggle further down the line, I can give myself a boost. Blimey, that was a bit sincere. I hate you all really.
The important thing to remember is even though I might be, according to some of you, looking great at the moment, I do still have a long way to go. I'm over halfway through the first stage of this diet, but the hard bit comes after that, when real food starts coming into it. I'm determined to get to my target of a size 12 which I reckon will involve losing around two more stone, but it's really hard to say. At the moment it feels quite easy but I know it won't stay that way, so it means a lot to me that I have so many people being so damned brilliant. Aaaargh, there goes that heartfelt sincerity again! I'd better go before I start weeping or something.
Home improvements: My flat is now nearly as beautiful as I want it to be. Thanks to the combined skills and general brilliance of my parents (Mum = painting and curtain making superstar. Dad = demon driller) and my own sense of motivation (which I never used to have before this diet), my living room is now all kinds of gorgeous. It's been rid of crappy Argos bookshelves and Ikea bits and pieces, and is full of things I really love from vintage shops and eBay. Speaking of which...
Spending money: Oh my god, I'm addicted to shopping. Over the past few weeks, Paypal has become my best pal. I've realised that everything is better in America and have been buying all sorts of clothes that don't fit me yet from sites like pinupgirlclothing.com, as well as loads more tat for my house from far-flung corners of the world like Oklahoma, Rotterdam and, er, Crystal Palace. I've also been spending money in actual shops, where you have to deal with human beings and everything, and today bought my first much smaller item that actually fits. I know a size 14 isn't small by a lot of people's standards, but it is definitely in the realms of "normal" and "curvy" rather than "fat", so for me to be able to buy something that size - and not even something stretchy, but a fitted autumnal jacket - is quite an achievement. And it wasn't a fluke - I tried on several different coats of various shapes and colours, and 14 was the right size in all of them. This is partly because my boobs (which normally had me firmly in size 18 territory with anything that needed to fasten) have shrunk quite a bit over the past week or so. Don't worry, whammer fans, they're still definitely prominent, but you might want to kiss goodbye to them soon. Not literally. Unless you're fit. Today I also bought a waist-cinching belt in a medium (the large was too big! This is unheard of!) which shows where my weight is coming off - my waist is under 32 inches now, but my hips are still of child-bearing proportions and, well, baby's most definitely got back. I'm still definitely a 16 in jeans, but that's OK - I like having an arse, and I know things will be in proportion eventually.
Socialising: My struggle with having fun while not boozing/eating is over - it's now totally fine. I went to a wedding drinks thing on Saturday night and had a brilliant time - the best I've had since starting the diet, and it didn't bother me at all that people were scoffing chips and knocking back shots of sambuca. I've also been enjoying doing different things - there have been more trips to the theatre, more gigs, more nice lunchtime strolls, more ridiculous conversations with Nicky (the day we run out of things to say to each other is the day the world ends) and I've just got home from my first ever meeting of Isabel's Book Group For Nice Girls Who Are Clever And Not Pretentious (search for it on Facebook if you want to join) where we discussed Lionel Shriver's We Need To Talk About Kevin. A lovely mixture of people came along and it made me feel all warm inside - and without the aid of Jack Daniels. I think that when it comes to drinking again, I'll take a much more moderate approach, as I've realised I absolutely don't need it to have a good time, which is quite the revelation for me.
Getting a big head: I've been really touched and overwhelmed by how lovely 99 per cent of people I know have been about me doing this. Obviously it goes without saying that my closest friends and family have been amazing, but I've also been getting lots of support and encouragement from people I don't know so well. Every day I get compliments about how good I'm looking, and some of the most meaningful come in the form of private messages from random people on the fringes of my life, because I know they wouldn't bother if they didn't mean it. It really keeps me going and I'll be keeping them all in a special file so if I struggle further down the line, I can give myself a boost. Blimey, that was a bit sincere. I hate you all really.
The important thing to remember is even though I might be, according to some of you, looking great at the moment, I do still have a long way to go. I'm over halfway through the first stage of this diet, but the hard bit comes after that, when real food starts coming into it. I'm determined to get to my target of a size 12 which I reckon will involve losing around two more stone, but it's really hard to say. At the moment it feels quite easy but I know it won't stay that way, so it means a lot to me that I have so many people being so damned brilliant. Aaaargh, there goes that heartfelt sincerity again! I'd better go before I start weeping or something.
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