So, I just went to the video shop (do we still call them that?) for some Sunday afternoon entertainment (I got Lars & The Real Girl, Happy Go Lucky and the probably quite dreadful My Sassy Girl, DVD rental fact fans. Starving people watch a lot of films. Well, apart from the ones in Africa...) and this happened:
Blockbuster Lady: "You get a free bag of popcorn with those."
Isabel: "Oh, I don't want one."
Blockbuster Lady: "But it's free!"
Isabel: "No no, I don't want it, thanks."
Blockbuster Lady: "It's free!"
Isabel: "I DON'T LIKE POPCORN." [clearly a massive lie. I bloody love the stuff, especially the sticky, eye-wateringly sweet, bagged kind that she was offering]
Blockbuster Lady: "OK, but I have to scan it anyway. Are you sure?"
Isabel: "I DON'T WANT IT. YOU KEEP IT!"
[silence]
She must have thought I was fucking rude but I do think this is a good example of how junk food is pretty much forced upon us all the time. Incidentally, I think this is the first time I've been in a free food situation (away from people's houses, I mean) since starting this diet, but I'm sure it won't be the last. Being a wanky media type, free food and booze are pretty much on tap seven nights a week if I chose to live that way. I've deliberately stayed away from those kinds of events recently, but I think I'll have one in a couple of weeks when I go to the opening of Lucky Voice in Islington (bollocks to shyness, I'll do karaoke sober). And then there's the company awards thing in October, which I'm already a bit concerned about (massive sit-down meal and free wine and champagne all night) but I've already arranged a plan with some greedy boys who'll eat my food, so it should be OK. But still, this is all quite stressful! I don't mind telling people I know about this diet (in fact, everyone is weirdly fascinated by it) but I don't want to have to explain it to strangers.
Right, I'm going to watch those films now with not a kernel of popcorn in sight.
Sunday 31 August 2008
Saturday 30 August 2008
According to my army of fans* I need to blog more often
* it's a small army.
Things are still going well. Saturdays are exciting for me now as it's when I have my weekly Lighter Life meeting and get weighed. Is it a bit sad that it's now probably the highlight of my week? Today I'd lost another 3lbs, so that's 1st 2lbs in total - in three weeks! I'm delighted. But to be honest, I find clothes sizes more tangible, so even more motivating is the fact that, before I started this process (crank up the Westlife and cut to voiceover: "Isabel's journey to The X Factor hasn't been an easy one...") I was a size 16-18, depending on the shop and the item in question, but I'm now firmly a size 16, all over - my size 18 jeans are dead to me. I'm sure a lot of skinny minnies reading this would cry if they were firmly a size 16, but it's an achievement for me, alright? I'm not going to buy any new clothes until I'm a 14, so for now they will just all have to be a bit loose, and I'm not going to buy loads of clothes until I'm a 12, when I will pat myself on the back and eat one tiny piece of chocolate.
So, who wants a visual? As I said, I've lost 1 stone 2 lbs, which is 16 lbs. Here's some shit that weighs 16 lbs:
So it's basically like I've given birth to a huge fish/bowling bowl/giant baby. Weird.
All in all, it's been a good week. Socialising has become enjoyable again (it was particularly enjoyable to watch all of my workmates get horrendously drunk at Jo Carnegie's leaving do on Thursday. I felt quite smug. Oh no, I'm one of those people now...), and now that I'm really able to see/feel results, it's very motivating. Also, today's meeting (two hours of "counselling") was really interesting - we learned about ego states, which I'd imagine is already a familiar concept to anyone who's studied psychology, but it was all new to me. It's to do with how we (and the people around us) either behave like a critical parent, nurturing parent, adult, rebellious child, free child or adapted child. We can all be all of those things at different times, and you can take them literally and apply them to your own relationship with your parents - I definitely have one critical parent and one nurturing parent (you know who you are!), but both of those things have positives and negatives. For example, a nurturing parent might have "treated" you with junk food when you were growing up, which could lead to a dodgy relationship with food now. I also act like a critical parent quite often, in that I'm quite, um, vocal about my opinions of people, even my friends (if I've got any left after admitting that) but wait, wait, don't hate me, I'm nurturing too - I like looking after them if they're sad.
Anyway, I could go on about all this for ages, but it's a bit too self-indulgent. Now I've got to clean my house. I've read on a few diet forums that some people use all the new energy they get from losing weight to clean their houses all the time. Sadly, this is yet to kick in. It's a pig-sty... it's just that the pig is a bit smaller now.
Things are still going well. Saturdays are exciting for me now as it's when I have my weekly Lighter Life meeting and get weighed. Is it a bit sad that it's now probably the highlight of my week? Today I'd lost another 3lbs, so that's 1st 2lbs in total - in three weeks! I'm delighted. But to be honest, I find clothes sizes more tangible, so even more motivating is the fact that, before I started this process (crank up the Westlife and cut to voiceover: "Isabel's journey to The X Factor hasn't been an easy one...") I was a size 16-18, depending on the shop and the item in question, but I'm now firmly a size 16, all over - my size 18 jeans are dead to me. I'm sure a lot of skinny minnies reading this would cry if they were firmly a size 16, but it's an achievement for me, alright? I'm not going to buy any new clothes until I'm a 14, so for now they will just all have to be a bit loose, and I'm not going to buy loads of clothes until I'm a 12, when I will pat myself on the back and eat one tiny piece of chocolate.
So, who wants a visual? As I said, I've lost 1 stone 2 lbs, which is 16 lbs. Here's some shit that weighs 16 lbs:
This fish (sorry Liv, I think it might be a koi carp):
The bowling ball that Barack Obama famously scored just 37 points with (ooh, topical):
So it's basically like I've given birth to a huge fish/bowling bowl/giant baby. Weird.
All in all, it's been a good week. Socialising has become enjoyable again (it was particularly enjoyable to watch all of my workmates get horrendously drunk at Jo Carnegie's leaving do on Thursday. I felt quite smug. Oh no, I'm one of those people now...), and now that I'm really able to see/feel results, it's very motivating. Also, today's meeting (two hours of "counselling") was really interesting - we learned about ego states, which I'd imagine is already a familiar concept to anyone who's studied psychology, but it was all new to me. It's to do with how we (and the people around us) either behave like a critical parent, nurturing parent, adult, rebellious child, free child or adapted child. We can all be all of those things at different times, and you can take them literally and apply them to your own relationship with your parents - I definitely have one critical parent and one nurturing parent (you know who you are!), but both of those things have positives and negatives. For example, a nurturing parent might have "treated" you with junk food when you were growing up, which could lead to a dodgy relationship with food now. I also act like a critical parent quite often, in that I'm quite, um, vocal about my opinions of people, even my friends (if I've got any left after admitting that) but wait, wait, don't hate me, I'm nurturing too - I like looking after them if they're sad.
Anyway, I could go on about all this for ages, but it's a bit too self-indulgent. Now I've got to clean my house. I've read on a few diet forums that some people use all the new energy they get from losing weight to clean their houses all the time. Sadly, this is yet to kick in. It's a pig-sty... it's just that the pig is a bit smaller now.
Tuesday 26 August 2008
It's official - I'm obsessed with food!
So, today I wrote a book review - a book review of Lorraine Kelly's autobiography Between Me And You. Man, I'm cool. Anyway, it was only after I'd submitted the review and re-read it that I realised it was brimming over with references to food/eating/hunger. Here are a few examples:
"...we were hungry for revelations..."
"...our appetite for scandal was not going to be satisfied..."
"...the whole thing is served up..."
"...unpleasant taste in your mouth..."
This has taught me two things:
1. I should stop writing in such dreadful cliches.
2. Food is clearly on my mind, even if it isn't in my stomach.
Point 1 isn't really relevant here - in fact, it's about as much use as a chocola... never mind. Point 2, on the other hand, is interesting. Food is obviously on my mind constantly, without me even realising it. Which is funny, as abstaining from normal food has, apart from a few fragile moments (more on those in a moment), been pretty easy. But that's because I'm obsessed with this diet. I have a pretty obsessive (addictive?) personality at the best of times, but I suppose it's good that it's directed towards a positive goal at the moment. At least, I think it's a positive goal. But as my ever-wise and straight-talking friend Olivia pointed out today, in some ways the Lighter Life plan is basically medically-approved anorexia. But I don't suppose I should worry about that now - I think I'll know when to stop. And I have a long way to go yet. Although, and it's time for a boast, I have lost a stone now. Well, nearly a stone - 13 pounds, to be precise, in just over two weeks. Two weeks! People are noticing it now, my waist is two inches smaller and my clothes are much looser. It's exciting, and it makes me feel so good (particularly when people say such nice encouraging things) that it makes up for the boringness of dieting.
But, onto those fragile moments - and the first is actually booze, not food, related. As I mentioned in my last post, this weekend was Reading Festival, always one of the highlights of my year - but normally because I'm drinking non-stop, eating crap, donning a blonde wig and performing to thousands of people as Dolly Parton, meeting unsavoury characters and having an amazing time with my friends. This year, I did have an amazing time with my friends, but it was tee-total, food-free fun. And I didn't know that could be any fun at all.
However, and I've been in two minds about whether to own up to this, I did have my first lapse, in the form of one - yes, only one - plastic cup of vodka and soda water. Tut tut. I umm-ed and ah-ed over it for ages, and then succumbed to the lure of the bar at around 8pm on the Saturday night. The ordering of the drink was time-consuming, the taste of the drink was vile, and the circumstances of the drink's consumption were stressful - in fact, most of it ended up down my top as I got pushed around during Bloc Party's brilliant set. And, of course, I didn't feel great about it. Although I knew that one drink would have little, if any, effect on my weight loss, it was the principle of the thing - I'm supposed to be abstaining completely. But, and this is a big but (but not as big as my butt), I do feel I learned from it. I actually feel proud of myself for getting through - and enjoying - a festival (how many of you could do it without real food or alcohol? OR drugs, before you try to be clever...) which will surely be the biggest challenge I'll face on this journey (oh Christ, I've started talking about my "journey" - it's just like The X Factor). And I know now that drinking while I'm dieting is pointless, because there was no enjoyment factor - I just felt tired and a bit disappointed in myself. And I have also learned that feeling left out is perhaps a trigger for me to drink - and maybe eat too? But, slight blip aside, I had a fantastic weekend and saw a lot more bands than I would have if I'd been heading back to my tent every couple of hours to have a few more swigs on the winebox. I saw Lightspeed Champion, Bloc Party, Los Campesinos, Vampire Weekend, The Wombats, Dan Le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip, Black Kids, MGMT, Frank Turner, Jack Penate, The Killers, Mystery Jets... plus bits of loads of others. And I remember it all - amazing!
The second challenge came yesterday, when I went to the aforementioned Olivia's house for a little barbecue. For years, I've been moaning about not having many good friends in South London, and now Olivia and James have moved to Peckham, so it's all very exciting. But it would be more exciting if I could eat. I actually felt fine when plate after plate of chicken wings, burgers, crisps and cheese were being passed around - I mostly just enjoyed the smell while demurely sipping my mushroom soup - and, in fact, it wasn't until we moved on to the pub that I felt a bit iffy. Everyone was ordering desserts, and Olivia plumped for ("plumped for"! See?! Obsessed!) a chocolate brownie thing with gooey sauce and ice cream. I wasn't tempted to eat it, but not being able to even entertain the idea of doing such a thing did make me feel a bit sad. It's hard sitting at a table of friends who are all naturally slim despite happily stuffing their faces with crap all afternoon - how do they do it?
Anyway, this blog post is a bit on the epic side (and no guinea pigs again. I am sorry...) so it's time to shut up and go to bed.
"...we were hungry for revelations..."
"...our appetite for scandal was not going to be satisfied..."
"...the whole thing is served up..."
"...unpleasant taste in your mouth..."
This has taught me two things:
1. I should stop writing in such dreadful cliches.
2. Food is clearly on my mind, even if it isn't in my stomach.
Point 1 isn't really relevant here - in fact, it's about as much use as a chocola... never mind. Point 2, on the other hand, is interesting. Food is obviously on my mind constantly, without me even realising it. Which is funny, as abstaining from normal food has, apart from a few fragile moments (more on those in a moment), been pretty easy. But that's because I'm obsessed with this diet. I have a pretty obsessive (addictive?) personality at the best of times, but I suppose it's good that it's directed towards a positive goal at the moment. At least, I think it's a positive goal. But as my ever-wise and straight-talking friend Olivia pointed out today, in some ways the Lighter Life plan is basically medically-approved anorexia. But I don't suppose I should worry about that now - I think I'll know when to stop. And I have a long way to go yet. Although, and it's time for a boast, I have lost a stone now. Well, nearly a stone - 13 pounds, to be precise, in just over two weeks. Two weeks! People are noticing it now, my waist is two inches smaller and my clothes are much looser. It's exciting, and it makes me feel so good (particularly when people say such nice encouraging things) that it makes up for the boringness of dieting.
But, onto those fragile moments - and the first is actually booze, not food, related. As I mentioned in my last post, this weekend was Reading Festival, always one of the highlights of my year - but normally because I'm drinking non-stop, eating crap, donning a blonde wig and performing to thousands of people as Dolly Parton, meeting unsavoury characters and having an amazing time with my friends. This year, I did have an amazing time with my friends, but it was tee-total, food-free fun. And I didn't know that could be any fun at all.
However, and I've been in two minds about whether to own up to this, I did have my first lapse, in the form of one - yes, only one - plastic cup of vodka and soda water. Tut tut. I umm-ed and ah-ed over it for ages, and then succumbed to the lure of the bar at around 8pm on the Saturday night. The ordering of the drink was time-consuming, the taste of the drink was vile, and the circumstances of the drink's consumption were stressful - in fact, most of it ended up down my top as I got pushed around during Bloc Party's brilliant set. And, of course, I didn't feel great about it. Although I knew that one drink would have little, if any, effect on my weight loss, it was the principle of the thing - I'm supposed to be abstaining completely. But, and this is a big but (but not as big as my butt), I do feel I learned from it. I actually feel proud of myself for getting through - and enjoying - a festival (how many of you could do it without real food or alcohol? OR drugs, before you try to be clever...) which will surely be the biggest challenge I'll face on this journey (oh Christ, I've started talking about my "journey" - it's just like The X Factor). And I know now that drinking while I'm dieting is pointless, because there was no enjoyment factor - I just felt tired and a bit disappointed in myself. And I have also learned that feeling left out is perhaps a trigger for me to drink - and maybe eat too? But, slight blip aside, I had a fantastic weekend and saw a lot more bands than I would have if I'd been heading back to my tent every couple of hours to have a few more swigs on the winebox. I saw Lightspeed Champion, Bloc Party, Los Campesinos, Vampire Weekend, The Wombats, Dan Le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip, Black Kids, MGMT, Frank Turner, Jack Penate, The Killers, Mystery Jets... plus bits of loads of others. And I remember it all - amazing!
The second challenge came yesterday, when I went to the aforementioned Olivia's house for a little barbecue. For years, I've been moaning about not having many good friends in South London, and now Olivia and James have moved to Peckham, so it's all very exciting. But it would be more exciting if I could eat. I actually felt fine when plate after plate of chicken wings, burgers, crisps and cheese were being passed around - I mostly just enjoyed the smell while demurely sipping my mushroom soup - and, in fact, it wasn't until we moved on to the pub that I felt a bit iffy. Everyone was ordering desserts, and Olivia plumped for ("plumped for"! See?! Obsessed!) a chocolate brownie thing with gooey sauce and ice cream. I wasn't tempted to eat it, but not being able to even entertain the idea of doing such a thing did make me feel a bit sad. It's hard sitting at a table of friends who are all naturally slim despite happily stuffing their faces with crap all afternoon - how do they do it?
Anyway, this blog post is a bit on the epic side (and no guinea pigs again. I am sorry...) so it's time to shut up and go to bed.
Tuesday 19 August 2008
Yawn
I haven't posted for a few days but don't worry, I haven't fallen off the "wagon", I've just been busy. It might be surprising that someone who no longer eats or drinks can be busy, but I have, so ner. I've visted relatives, watched films, consoled heartbroken friends and, well, that's about it really. But it's all been quite time-consuming.
Speaking of time, it's going so slowly. Which is annoying, as it's not like I've just been sitting at home measuring my thumbs to see if they're a millimetre thinner. Normally, when I'm busy, time whizzes by, but the last week has felt like a month. I think the problem is, other than this diet, I don't have anything exciting to get my teeth into. I'm going to Reading this weekend which would normally be a summer highlight, but now I just feel daunted by the idea of doing a festival without booze (the food side doesn't really bother me, since I can definitely live without greasy £8 burgers and stale £5 bacon sandwiches). Maybe I'm an idiot to still go, but it's a freebie, and I've been every year since the beginning of time, so I don't want to feel that I've missed out. What I'm trying to say is that social things that I'd normally look forward to now fill me with a slight sense of dread, as well as having to worry about the practicalities of making up the foodpacks when I'm not at home or work. I guess the only thing I'm really excited about is the goal of being a size 12 by Christmas - but that seems so remote at the moment.
I'm also worried that I've become really boring. And a quick read-through of what I've just written doesn't really help. I'm no longer generating anecdotes about drunken escapades and adventures, and all I can think about is this diet. But still, I know it's early days and hopefully that will change. At the moment I'm finding it hard to even pick up a book and read without getting distracted by thoughts of Lighter Life. Still, all this means I do feel very motivated to succeed - I haven't even been tempted by food, and am actually enjoying how empowering it all feels. I just wish I could fast forward three months.
Sorry this is so boring, with not a guinea pig in sight (although I have lost another couple since I last wrote, and it's starting to become visible) but, well, I'm boring now. Help!
Speaking of time, it's going so slowly. Which is annoying, as it's not like I've just been sitting at home measuring my thumbs to see if they're a millimetre thinner. Normally, when I'm busy, time whizzes by, but the last week has felt like a month. I think the problem is, other than this diet, I don't have anything exciting to get my teeth into. I'm going to Reading this weekend which would normally be a summer highlight, but now I just feel daunted by the idea of doing a festival without booze (the food side doesn't really bother me, since I can definitely live without greasy £8 burgers and stale £5 bacon sandwiches). Maybe I'm an idiot to still go, but it's a freebie, and I've been every year since the beginning of time, so I don't want to feel that I've missed out. What I'm trying to say is that social things that I'd normally look forward to now fill me with a slight sense of dread, as well as having to worry about the practicalities of making up the foodpacks when I'm not at home or work. I guess the only thing I'm really excited about is the goal of being a size 12 by Christmas - but that seems so remote at the moment.
I'm also worried that I've become really boring. And a quick read-through of what I've just written doesn't really help. I'm no longer generating anecdotes about drunken escapades and adventures, and all I can think about is this diet. But still, I know it's early days and hopefully that will change. At the moment I'm finding it hard to even pick up a book and read without getting distracted by thoughts of Lighter Life. Still, all this means I do feel very motivated to succeed - I haven't even been tempted by food, and am actually enjoying how empowering it all feels. I just wish I could fast forward three months.
Sorry this is so boring, with not a guinea pig in sight (although I have lost another couple since I last wrote, and it's starting to become visible) but, well, I'm boring now. Help!
Wednesday 13 August 2008
Why Facebook is evil
Normally Facebook acts as a catalogue of romantic disasters and fairweather friendships, but now it's taunting me about my diet too, and all the things I can't have. Just look!
Lucy Kemp has had a boozy Wednesday.
Emma Simkins's summer veg pasta rocked.
Sarah Pike really should be all pizza'd out by now.
Rajinder Kaur Randhawa is eating a pie that she made a month ago for dinner thanks to the wonder of freezers.
Hayley Henderson was cooking pasta yesterday...NOT TODAY!!!!
Clair Terry is looking forward to many a blue cocktail with Kiki tonight.
Gemma Bull has eaten a ridiculous amount of chocolate fingers.
Nick Davies has been busted with the fruit and nut.
Trish Mohan has just made lettuce soup and eaten a huge bar of chocolate!
Jen Crothers warns, "Do not eat the Eat soup today."
Kate Blinkhorn is eating a rubbish lunch cause of the credit crunch!
John Ellis needs a mug of milk.
And those are all from the past three days! Oh, what I wouldn't give to be nibbling on one of Gemma Bull's chocolate fingers or slurping on Clair Terry's blue cocktail. Hell, even Auntie Trish's lettuce soup sounds quite appetising. Sigh. OK, so I'm just being dramatic - I'm actually feeling pretty great and have even just been swimming. I'd been going twice a week for the past month or so but hadn't been since starting the diet as I was worried I'd be too weak, what with surviving on 500 calories a day and all. But it turns out I feel fine. In fact, I feel energetic - which is annoying, as it's nearly bedtime.
But first, I just wanted to draw attention to the fact that it seems EVERYONE is obsessed with food and drink, to the point that it's the first thing that pops into their head when Facebook asks them what they're doing right now. It's interesting that it's taken my own abstinence from conventional food for me to notice that. Actually, maybe it isn't interesting, but I just think it is because I have no real life other than this diet at the moment. Hmm, worrying. Whatevs, I'll embrace it - I was reading something similar on lighterlifecommunity.co.uk (which I'm now more addicted to than Facebook), basically saying how people doing this diet really notice other people's eating habits at work, in restaurants, at family dinners etc, and it makes them re-evaluate their own approach to food. I guess people's food and drink related status updates are just a virtual extension of this. I have to say though, pre-diet, if I had been scoffing, I'd be very unlikely to mention it on Facebook, as I'd probably be ashamed of it. Interesting. I wonder what that says about my attitude to food compared to "normal" people who mention it so casually?
I'll be watching you, you greedy piggies.
Lucy Kemp has had a boozy Wednesday.
Emma Simkins's summer veg pasta rocked.
Sarah Pike really should be all pizza'd out by now.
Rajinder Kaur Randhawa is eating a pie that she made a month ago for dinner thanks to the wonder of freezers.
Hayley Henderson was cooking pasta yesterday...NOT TODAY!!!!
Clair Terry is looking forward to many a blue cocktail with Kiki tonight.
Gemma Bull has eaten a ridiculous amount of chocolate fingers.
Nick Davies has been busted with the fruit and nut.
Trish Mohan has just made lettuce soup and eaten a huge bar of chocolate!
Jen Crothers warns, "Do not eat the Eat soup today."
Kate Blinkhorn is eating a rubbish lunch cause of the credit crunch!
John Ellis needs a mug of milk.
And those are all from the past three days! Oh, what I wouldn't give to be nibbling on one of Gemma Bull's chocolate fingers or slurping on Clair Terry's blue cocktail. Hell, even Auntie Trish's lettuce soup sounds quite appetising. Sigh. OK, so I'm just being dramatic - I'm actually feeling pretty great and have even just been swimming. I'd been going twice a week for the past month or so but hadn't been since starting the diet as I was worried I'd be too weak, what with surviving on 500 calories a day and all. But it turns out I feel fine. In fact, I feel energetic - which is annoying, as it's nearly bedtime.
But first, I just wanted to draw attention to the fact that it seems EVERYONE is obsessed with food and drink, to the point that it's the first thing that pops into their head when Facebook asks them what they're doing right now. It's interesting that it's taken my own abstinence from conventional food for me to notice that. Actually, maybe it isn't interesting, but I just think it is because I have no real life other than this diet at the moment. Hmm, worrying. Whatevs, I'll embrace it - I was reading something similar on lighterlifecommunity.co.uk (which I'm now more addicted to than Facebook), basically saying how people doing this diet really notice other people's eating habits at work, in restaurants, at family dinners etc, and it makes them re-evaluate their own approach to food. I guess people's food and drink related status updates are just a virtual extension of this. I have to say though, pre-diet, if I had been scoffing, I'd be very unlikely to mention it on Facebook, as I'd probably be ashamed of it. Interesting. I wonder what that says about my attitude to food compared to "normal" people who mention it so casually?
I'll be watching you, you greedy piggies.
Tuesday 12 August 2008
More on Isabel's shock weight loss...
So, in week one of Lighter Life, there's a midweek "pop-in" session and I went to mine this evening. I'd expected to lose one or two pounds, but I'd lost seven - the most out of the whole group of eight people!
Go me.
Anyway, I thought I'd try and put this into perspective by finding out what weighs seven pounds...
SEVEN guinea pigs:
FOUR trays of Krispy Kreme doughnuts:
TWO human brains:
ONE AND A HALF chihuahuas:
ONE average newborn baby:
How fucking weird is it that I've lost that in four days? It ought to be more visible than it is. I'll be getting weighed again on Saturday, so fingers crossed I shed another couple of boxes of Krispy Kremes before then - it's VERY motivating.
Go me.
Anyway, I thought I'd try and put this into perspective by finding out what weighs seven pounds...
SEVEN guinea pigs:
FOUR trays of Krispy Kreme doughnuts:
TWO human brains:
ONE AND A HALF chihuahuas:
ONE average newborn baby:
How fucking weird is it that I've lost that in four days? It ought to be more visible than it is. I'll be getting weighed again on Saturday, so fingers crossed I shed another couple of boxes of Krispy Kremes before then - it's VERY motivating.
NEWSFLASH! OMG! I've lost HALF A STONE in FOUR DAYS!
Come back later for more on this breaking story.
Monday 11 August 2008
"BLOG! BLOG LIKE THE WIND!!!"
These are the words my slightly eccentric friend Daniel shouted, at the top of his voice (and believe me, that's fucking loud) when I said goodbye to him an hour or so ago in the middle of Soho. People stared. People crossed the road to avoid him. So, to prevent any further public humiliation, blog I shall. It actually feels really good to write down how I'm feeling, as it's been a tough day. Work itself was fine, and I was amazed by how enthusiastic and interested everyone seemed when they realised I was doing this diet. One particularly nice workmate (hello Kay!) even came to the kitchen with me because she wanted to watch me mixing up one of my shakes!
I did flag throughout the day, and felt particularly rubbish mid-morning and then mid-afternoon, but generally it was OK, and some people even commented that my skin looks better already. I've noticed this too, I think, but it's probably more to do with the fact that I haven't been drunk for, ooh, six days, than anything food-related.
Anyway, the tough point came this evening, when I went to a colleague's book launch (Jo Carnegie, who's written a bonkbuster called Country Pursuits, if you're interested). I was in two minds about going as it seemed a bit foolish to put myself in a social situation - and not just any social situation, but one with free booze! - so early on in this diet, especially as everyone says that Day 3 is the toughest. But, I went along anyway, and did indeed find it really hard. Reassuringly, though, it wasn't the not eating/drinking that felt difficult - I can honestly say I had no desire to grab a flute of champagne, even though it was being thrust in my face every few minutes. It was more that I felt overwhelmed by all the people, which is really unusual for me, as I'm generally to be found chattering away in the middle of things. I think it was probably just because at the moment I feel weak, hungry and a bit lightheaded, but I really struggled and felt like I needed to get out of there quick. I even found it hard to find the energy to chat with my friends Jordan and Charlotte, and they are officially two of the most talkative people in the western world.
Still, I suppose I passed the test (not succumbing to food or drink, and so early on too), so perhaps I should feel pleased with myself. But it's put me off from saying yes to any similar invitations in the next couple of weeks. If I'm going to be sociable, I think it should be in small groups, not big boozy schmoozy scenarios. I always knew that the social side of my life would be the hardest part of all this, what with it revolving around food and drink. But at least I tried! It has spurred me on to try and come up with a list of fun things I can do in the next three months that have nothing to do with eating. Perhaps I can even become a bit cultured. Let me know if you have any suggestions...
I did flag throughout the day, and felt particularly rubbish mid-morning and then mid-afternoon, but generally it was OK, and some people even commented that my skin looks better already. I've noticed this too, I think, but it's probably more to do with the fact that I haven't been drunk for, ooh, six days, than anything food-related.
Anyway, the tough point came this evening, when I went to a colleague's book launch (Jo Carnegie, who's written a bonkbuster called Country Pursuits, if you're interested). I was in two minds about going as it seemed a bit foolish to put myself in a social situation - and not just any social situation, but one with free booze! - so early on in this diet, especially as everyone says that Day 3 is the toughest. But, I went along anyway, and did indeed find it really hard. Reassuringly, though, it wasn't the not eating/drinking that felt difficult - I can honestly say I had no desire to grab a flute of champagne, even though it was being thrust in my face every few minutes. It was more that I felt overwhelmed by all the people, which is really unusual for me, as I'm generally to be found chattering away in the middle of things. I think it was probably just because at the moment I feel weak, hungry and a bit lightheaded, but I really struggled and felt like I needed to get out of there quick. I even found it hard to find the energy to chat with my friends Jordan and Charlotte, and they are officially two of the most talkative people in the western world.
Still, I suppose I passed the test (not succumbing to food or drink, and so early on too), so perhaps I should feel pleased with myself. But it's put me off from saying yes to any similar invitations in the next couple of weeks. If I'm going to be sociable, I think it should be in small groups, not big boozy schmoozy scenarios. I always knew that the social side of my life would be the hardest part of all this, what with it revolving around food and drink. But at least I tried! It has spurred me on to try and come up with a list of fun things I can do in the next three months that have nothing to do with eating. Perhaps I can even become a bit cultured. Let me know if you have any suggestions...
Sunday 10 August 2008
Day 2 - and THIS is what my kitchen cupboard now looks like...
Mmm, doesn't it just make your mouth water?
Things are going well, though. I went to see Mamma Mia at the cinema today so couldn't possibly be feeling anything other than chipper - it's the silliest, girliest, jolliest film since Enchanted.
I do feel a bit lightheaded but that's to be expected for the first few days - but I am a bit worried about feeling rubbish at work tomorrow. Still, at least it will be a distraction from starvation.
Anyway, I really don't have the energy to write anything entertaining (um, I'd better have got over this by 9.30 tomorrow, or there are going to be some seriously pissed off Heatworld users writing "meh" in the comments box on every story) so I'm going to dive back into my My So Called Life boxset. I've decided that boxsets are the way forward while my social life is slightly on hold - perhaps I should try to lose a stone a series...
Saturday 9 August 2008
It's not like me to come over all shy...
... but there's something very, very embarrassing about starting this blog. Depsite the fact that I spend every day getting paid for being good at choosing the right words, suddenly my mind's gone completely blank. But that might be because this blog is all about me, and that makes me feel extremely self-conscious. Oh well, I suppose I should just be honest. Eek...
The truth is, after a whole life of being "curvy" (which we all know is just a euphemism for "Look at the arse on that!") I've decided to lose weight. A lot of weight, hopefully. As you may know (assuming you know me - and if you don't know me, then who the eff are you?), I've been wittering on for a few weeks now about starting the Lighter Life diet. If you want to know what that is, Google it - I can't be bothered to get into the technicalities right now. I'll just say that, as diets go, it's pretty serious (but medically-approved, so bore off with your scare-mongering), and the average person loses between three and five stone in the initial 100 day period of abstinence from conventional food and drink. Yes, drink. No booze for me for three months - at least! But I'll touch upon that at some other point. For now, I just wanted to get this show on the road - I went to my first group meeting thingy this morning, and it was really good. I've since started on the foodpacks I'll be living on for the next three months - I have to have four a day, and so far I've had two - a strawberry shake earlier on, and a mushroom soupy thing just now. They were much nicer than I was expecting (the 'shroom one just tasted like Cup-A-Soup) but it's weird not having anything to chew on. I'm not even allowed to chew gum (so all those pesky office chewing gum thieves will have to get their minty-fresh breath from other sources. Ha).
The truth is, after a whole life of being "curvy" (which we all know is just a euphemism for "Look at the arse on that!") I've decided to lose weight. A lot of weight, hopefully. As you may know (assuming you know me - and if you don't know me, then who the eff are you?), I've been wittering on for a few weeks now about starting the Lighter Life diet. If you want to know what that is, Google it - I can't be bothered to get into the technicalities right now. I'll just say that, as diets go, it's pretty serious (but medically-approved, so bore off with your scare-mongering), and the average person loses between three and five stone in the initial 100 day period of abstinence from conventional food and drink. Yes, drink. No booze for me for three months - at least! But I'll touch upon that at some other point. For now, I just wanted to get this show on the road - I went to my first group meeting thingy this morning, and it was really good. I've since started on the foodpacks I'll be living on for the next three months - I have to have four a day, and so far I've had two - a strawberry shake earlier on, and a mushroom soupy thing just now. They were much nicer than I was expecting (the 'shroom one just tasted like Cup-A-Soup) but it's weird not having anything to chew on. I'm not even allowed to chew gum (so all those pesky office chewing gum thieves will have to get their minty-fresh breath from other sources. Ha).
Anyway, this is really just a train of thought, so I'll finish it off with a bit of musing about my targets. I don't want to go into how much I currently weigh (more than Mary-Kate Olsen, less than Beth Ditto. I hope) but I'll say that at the moment I'm a size 16-18 (definitely an 18 if tits 'n' ass come into it, but a 16 in non-boob-squishing tops) and would like to be a 12-14 before Christmas time. I actually really don't care about how much I weigh - it's more about wanting to look good in nice clothes. And, er, be healthy and stuff obviously. Yes yes, must mention being healthy, or people will think I'm really shallow.
So, that's the introduction out of the way. I'm about to clear my cupboards of all edible stuff (definite advantage of living alone - I can only imagine how hard this diet must be for people who have other mouths to feed. I only have Delilah's cat food to worry about) and then try to think about something else. At the moment, I feel hungry, but I think it's psychological - two of my best friends (big up the Nicky and the Daniel) have phoned me this afternoon to see how things are going, and as soon as I started chattering to them, I didn't feel hungry at all. More entertainment and less introspection needed I think, just to get me through these first few days.
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