Triumph

Back in July, when I was waiting to start Lighter Life, I bought a lovely red dress from ASOS in a size 12-14. I've never been a size 12-14 in my life, not even when I was a kid, so it was a bit of a risk to buy it when I hadn't even started the diet, but I knew how determined I was.

So, I've been trying the dress on at regular intervals ever since then. Three months ago, I couldn't even begin to get it on. A month ago, I could get it on, but it was too tight on the boobs and arms. Fast forward to this weekend, and I was fretting about what to wear to my brother in law's 40th birthday party. My wardrobe is quite limited at the moment, because I've got rid of all of my old stuff but am reluctant to buy too many new things in transitional sizes. So, I tried on the red dress, expecting it to still be too tight, but I think you know what's coming... it fit perfectly!

I ended up wearing it to David's party, had a great time and got lots and lots of compliments. I have to say, I'm enjoying all the attention. When I stop losing weight, I might have to drastically alter my appearance from week to week (shaved head? Tattoos? Face transplant?) just to keep the attention coming, like some kind of publicity-hungry celebrity. Jesus, I could turn into Jodie Marsh. Anyway, here is the hard evidence that the dress fits (incidentally, a few months ago there's no way I would have allowed a full-length photo to be taken next to a friend as skinny and gorgeous as Nicky... although admittedly, it's not the best picture of her - sorry Stocks, but I look nice!):



I know it sounds silly to put so much meaning into an item of clothing, but fitting into it felt like an impossible dream, so it meant so much to be able to wear it. It's the first time in my life that I've given myself an incentive and actually achieved my goal. And that feels amazing.

People keep asking me how much longer this diet goes on for. Let me explain so I don't have to have this conversation again. Initially, you sign up for 100 days of "abstinence", existing on four foodpacks a day and loads of water. My 100 days is up on November 15th, less than two weeks from now. But at that point you can carry on for as long as you like, until you get to your target weight. I've lost exactly three and a half stone so far, and to get to my original target of a size 12, I reckon I need to lose around two more stone, although it's quite tricky to gauge it. I've decided to lose another stone and a half and then re-evaluate, which should take me into December. I do not want to be in total abstinence at all in 2009, so either at the end of December or the beginning of January, I'll start the Management section of the diet, which is the most important bit when it comes to maintaining my new weight. It's a set 12 week programme which is very gradual, so initially I'll still be having three of the foodpacks a day plus one protein-based meal, with different kinds of foods being introduced each week. This all feels quite daunting as by that point I won't have eaten normal food for over four months! It means that by the time my 28th birthday (ugh) rolls around at the end of February, I should be eating fairly normally and drinking a bit and after months of no booze, I'd imagine I'll be a very cheap date.

You may have noticed that Christmas sits quite clumsily in the middle of all this uncertainty. I'm hoping that I'll be able to have a protein meal - ie turkey plus vegetables - on Christmas Day, but I'm really not that fussed and will see how I'm getting on at the time. Christmas isn't particularly important to me and my mum isn't into cooking, so I don't think anyone will be remotely bothered if I'm not eating a proper Christmas dinner. I can just entertain the children or something. The main thing I'm excited about Christmas-wise are all the clothes vouchers I'm going to demand, because that's the kind of vain, shallow human being this diet is turning me into. And I'll be a size 12 by then and will actually be able to buy stuff that will fit for more than a month. So exciting.

In fact, I'm excited about 2009 generally. 2007 was absolute hell for various reasons, 2008 has been more reflective and a time for personal development and improvement inside and out, and 2009 is when Isabel: The Relaunch will take place. Move over Britney, THIS is the comeback everyone will be talking about...